Funnies, PECANS IN THE CEMETERY

On the outskirts of a small town, there was a big, old pecan tree just inside the cemetery fence. One day, two boys filled up a bucketful of nuts and sat down by the tree, out of sight, and began dividing the nuts. 'One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me,' said one boy. They dropped several nuts and they rolled down toward the fence.

Another boy came riding along the road on his bike. As he passed, he thought he heard voices from the inside of the cemetery. He slowed down so he could investigate and sure enough, he heard, 'One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me.' He was sure he knew just what it was. He jumped on his bike and quickly rode off.

Just around the corner, he met an old man with a cane, hobbling along. 'Come here quick,' said the boy, 'you won't believe what I heard! Satan and the Lord are down at the cemetery dividing up the souls.' The old man said, 'Beat it kid, can't you see it's hard for me to walk.' When the boy continued to insist, the old man began to hobble slowly to the cemetery. Then, standing by the fence, they heard, 'One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me.' The old man whispered, 'Boy, you've been tellin' me the truth. Let's see if we can see the Lord.' Shaking with fear, they peered through the fence, yet they were still unable to see anything.

The old man and the boy gripped the wrought iron bars of the fence tighter and tighter as they tried to get a glimpse of the Lord. At last they heard, 'One for you, one for me. That's all of them. Now let's go get those nuts by the fence and we'll be done.' They say the old man made it back to town a full 5 minutes ahead of the kid on his bike.